Pawhuska OK USA - Rating PG

(J'aime Paris quand il fait chaud) 

Bubba Winchester, our Entertainment Committee Chairman, called in from Paris, France.  Oh, but first, it looks like we may have some dead chicken from Charley’s place, after I found out that the dead ones cost considerably less than live ones, and, the good news is, we don’t have to feed them.  So, along with the sushi that someone said they would bring, we’ll probably have some chicken.

Interestingly, in French that is poulet (pronounced poo-lay) and that sounded so much better than dead chicken, so let me rephrase that last one; looks like we will have des poulet mort (doesn’t that sound better?) from Charley’s place.

Mimi, it turns out, does speak some French and she had taught Bubba a greeting on the plane going over there.  Est-que vous voulez coucher avec moi ce soir?  Bubba tried that with a taxi driver on the way from Orly aeroport and he said he must have said it wrong because the taxi driver stopped on a highway. He made Bubba, Fifi and Mimi get out, with their entire luggage, right there on the highway.  Bubba found out "Sortez vous!" does not mean short cut.

They did get into Paris, finally, when Mimi lifted her skirt up to hitch a ride like Claudette Colbert did in It Happened One Night. A police cruiser took them on into Paris.  Someone had told Bubba that he would enjoy going to Moulin Rouge but Bubba said that they couldn’t find it.  When they got to where the concierge told them to go, all they could find was an old red windmill.

Bubba said that they then went to the Rive gauche, which is French for wrong side of the creek.  Bubba said that they told him it was the left bank, but when he turned around and looked the other way it was on his right.  The French are difficult for Bubba to understand, according to Mimi, but we can imagine that Bubba is pretty difficult for the French to understand too.  Mimi said that when he isn’t understood, he talks slower and louder, and that’s just in Arkansas.

Bubba, Mimi and Fifi went to the Louvre on the recommendation of a drunk that they met on the Rue de les Champs Elysees and Bubba said it was just another museum to him.  Bubba said that he thought it was the tallest oil derrick he had ever seen, but then it turned out to be the Eiffel Tower, which he had wanted to climb to the top.  He has changed his mind though, after seeing it up close.

He still had a lot of money left from his winnings in Las Vegas so he and the girls rented a Citroen car and are driving down to Monte Carlo to reinvest the money.  He has learned so much about gambling that he is pretty sure he can make all of the money back and then some.  However, I am getting a little concerned about his making it back on time for the non-reunion and having some money left over.

He told me not to worry though, because his sister Charleen will be there at the non-reunion and he had told her that he put her in charge of security (She wanted to feel like she had something to do).  Bubba said that we are lucky that Charleen’s parole came through early.

That’s all I have from Bubba for now, so all I can do is wait for him to call from Monte Carlo.  He said he didn’t think the girls would need swimming suits, or at least the tops, he might have said.  The connection was a little scratchy.  I’ll let you know more as soon as I hear from him.

Stevie Joe

Non-Reunion Entertainment Committee Chairman Bubba

Date: 5/24/07

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